The power exchange in the BDSM lifestyle

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The power exchange in the BDSM lifestyle

by Wayne Leon Learmond

Before this article begins, it is important to stress that when referring to 'Masters', or if. 'submissives' are referring to their 'Masters' the *m', 'i 'h' [in he] and every other personal references to 'Masters' are all capitalized within BDSM. This denotes power, dominance and authority. So, for example, 'my *Master*, *He* is something special. In reference to 'submissives', the beginning of the word is never capitalised. This denotes submission, and subservience.

When involved in the BDSM lifestyle, power exchange has to be at the forefront of anything that happens within that relationship. Masters gain their power from their submissive's submissiveness. The submissive gains her/his power by giving up all of their worries, cares and anxieties to their Master. In other words, submissives are handing over their 'shame'. And this is how it should always be within BDSM.

Within BDSM relationships, the power exchange takes part every single day of the week. It never wavers or ends. Sometimes those who are just beginning within this type of relationship forget their roles - and even those who have had many years’ experience can forget too. For example a submissive may absent-mindlessly, carry out her/his chores without the orders of their Master. Or they may decide to 'sleep in' spending an extra hour in bed when their Master specifically states that he/she wants them up at a certain time.

It is little things like this that can make a difference within this type of relationship. Because when orders are not carried out, then the power-exchange is not taking place. This can leave feelings of anger, and frustration, on the Master's part. This can also then lead to frustration on the part of the submissive. This is because the two within this relationship are not being true to the relationship or themselves. In other words, there is no power exchange taking part, and so this will only lead to arguments and an eventual assessment of the relationship as a whole.

Power exchange HAS to be a major part of BDSM because without it there is simply no BDSM. The power a Master feels over their submissives is something that is priceless. This is what Masters look for when in this kind of relationship. This is even more so, when the power exchange within BDSM is a long distance one. If the relationship is long-distance, over the Internet/phone, then trust becomes absolutely crucial - as does the absolute.


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